The statistic from the DRC is heartbreaking:
250,000+ women and girls raped in 13 years - more than 1,000 a month - by military and militia.
Their stories are gut-wrenching.
But we can help change that.
We can help the women and girls of the DRC - our mothers, our sisters, our friends - author new stories - stories of hope and victory.
Do you want to help? Can you help write a new story?
In Ottawa? Please come to A Memory, A Monologue, A Rant and A Prayer on Saturday March 13th at the Canadian Museum of Civlization. Tickets are $30. Donations are accepted at www.hopeangercourage.com
You can also visit www.vday.org and read more about the City of Joy being built to help the survivors of the worst sexual violence in the world rebuild and reclaim their lives.
Let's write a better story with them.
10 March 2010
3 March 2010
Random Musings
1) I get irritated when people think business travel is just like a holiday. Yes, I get to see some great, amazing places with my job but between January 4th and today, I have been home exactly 18 days. I've been on 5 continents and too many airplanes to count. All I really want is some down time. And my bed.
2) I feel like I missed the entire Winter Olympics except for the third period and overtime of the men's gold medal hockey game which was playing at the Canadian embassy here in Australia. But man, what a goal!
3) It is 10 days until A Memory, A Monologue, A Rant and A Prayer (http://www.hopeangercourage.com/) and what amazes me is how some people in my life who know how important this event is to me are silent about it and how some people I barely know are incredibly supportive
4) I love writing. I love writing fiction. And I love working out the characters and their choices in my head. I often feel like I'm just hosting them in my head before they get put down on paper
5) Ever feel like you're on the verge of something great with another person? That if you could just get your respective acts together what waits for you both is amazing? What do you do if obstacles keep appearing? Do you walk away? At what point do your arms get tired of holding that particular torch?
6) Daniel Craig is 42.
2) I feel like I missed the entire Winter Olympics except for the third period and overtime of the men's gold medal hockey game which was playing at the Canadian embassy here in Australia. But man, what a goal!
3) It is 10 days until A Memory, A Monologue, A Rant and A Prayer (http://www.hopeangercourage.com/) and what amazes me is how some people in my life who know how important this event is to me are silent about it and how some people I barely know are incredibly supportive
4) I love writing. I love writing fiction. And I love working out the characters and their choices in my head. I often feel like I'm just hosting them in my head before they get put down on paper
5) Ever feel like you're on the verge of something great with another person? That if you could just get your respective acts together what waits for you both is amazing? What do you do if obstacles keep appearing? Do you walk away? At what point do your arms get tired of holding that particular torch?
6) Daniel Craig is 42.
We should all take a moment to admire his gifts.7) The second term of school is proving much more challenging than the first. But I will prevail
8) Invictus, the movie, was disappointing. The acting was great but the script was weak and given the story they had to work with, that's an epic fail
9) The pork buns at the Conrad Hotel in Hong Kong are worth the trip
10) The teddy bear they give you to cuddle at the Conrad Hotel in Hong Kong is also worth the trip
28 February 2010
The Blind Side
I watched The Blind Side tonight and was, as so many others have been, incredibly moved by it.
(Yes I cried. All of you who thought there was a chance I wouldn't, raise your hands....)
There was a persistent theme that stayed with me through the walk back to the hotel. Do we open our wallets because it's easier than opening our hearts? Is that our blind side?
I'm not for a moment proposing that we all go in search of someone in need of a home, take them in and "save" them from their life. It's not possible for all of us to do what the Tuohys did.
But we can do some of what they did. The education, the clothes, the home were all happy secondary benefits from their hearts being opened to a young man who had been ignored, passed over and forgotten.
How many times do we pass people on the street and look away rather than look them in the eye? How many times do we drop a few coins in a cup or a hat but don't utter a word to the person we're giving them to? It's as though we're happy enough to give away our money but don't ask us to connect with the person.
Charity is not just the benevolent donation of money, the latin word caritas is actually defined as unlimited loving-kindness towards all others.
But the donation of money is easier for us than the donation of kindness. It requires much less of who we are to write a cheque or drop a few coins than it does to spend time with someone.
If we truly want to be charitable to others, look them in the eye, smile at them - as trite as that sounds - touch them, acknowledge them. For some - be they homeless or colleagues or friends - it may be the only acknowledgement they receive. So many people feel invisible and so many are invisible to us that by recognizing their presence we shine a light on them and on ourselves.
And when there is complete illumination, there are no blind sides.
(Yes I cried. All of you who thought there was a chance I wouldn't, raise your hands....)
There was a persistent theme that stayed with me through the walk back to the hotel. Do we open our wallets because it's easier than opening our hearts? Is that our blind side?
I'm not for a moment proposing that we all go in search of someone in need of a home, take them in and "save" them from their life. It's not possible for all of us to do what the Tuohys did.
But we can do some of what they did. The education, the clothes, the home were all happy secondary benefits from their hearts being opened to a young man who had been ignored, passed over and forgotten.
How many times do we pass people on the street and look away rather than look them in the eye? How many times do we drop a few coins in a cup or a hat but don't utter a word to the person we're giving them to? It's as though we're happy enough to give away our money but don't ask us to connect with the person.
Charity is not just the benevolent donation of money, the latin word caritas is actually defined as unlimited loving-kindness towards all others.
But the donation of money is easier for us than the donation of kindness. It requires much less of who we are to write a cheque or drop a few coins than it does to spend time with someone.
If we truly want to be charitable to others, look them in the eye, smile at them - as trite as that sounds - touch them, acknowledge them. For some - be they homeless or colleagues or friends - it may be the only acknowledgement they receive. So many people feel invisible and so many are invisible to us that by recognizing their presence we shine a light on them and on ourselves.
And when there is complete illumination, there are no blind sides.
25 February 2010
Forget New York....
...the city that never sleeps is Hong Kong.
or perhaps I should say the city I never sleep in is Hong Kong.
This is my second trip to this amazing little island and just like last year I am unable to sleep more than two or three hours at a stretch. Which is fine for a night or two but as I close in on night seven, it's making me a little punchy. And grumpy. With a dash of crabby.
I can't quite figure out if it's the energy, that productive hum that never seems to stop that keeps me awake or is it because I literally feel like I'm upside down and backwards?
Perhaps the 37 airplanes in three months is a factor?
Regardless - sleep deprived or not - this is a fabulous place. Some of the highlights:
1) Hong Kong taxis. They are all Toyota Crown cars (insert recall joke here) and they whip around the city in no time flat - taking a taxi here is a treat....
2) ...except when travelling up to Stanley Market. The winding streets and up and down of the hills is enough to test even the strongest of stomachs. I always seem to have a can of gingerale on me.
3) There is such an interesting mix of the West and the East here. You can get almost anything from either culture and it all fits together harmoniously.
4) Sitting in a restaurant on the Kowloon side watching the light show at 8 pm on the Hong Kong side - lasers, spotlights and seizure inducing strobes!
5) Shopping. Stanley has to be one of my favourite markets in the world. There is a jewellery store there that is simply amazing. Don't ask me the name but I sure can draw you a map to it. They will make earrings to match a necklace if they don't have any on display and they offer generous discounts when making bulk purchases.
I'll be sad to leave tomorrow (as I jet off to Sydney) but mostly I just want some sleep!
or perhaps I should say the city I never sleep in is Hong Kong.
This is my second trip to this amazing little island and just like last year I am unable to sleep more than two or three hours at a stretch. Which is fine for a night or two but as I close in on night seven, it's making me a little punchy. And grumpy. With a dash of crabby.
I can't quite figure out if it's the energy, that productive hum that never seems to stop that keeps me awake or is it because I literally feel like I'm upside down and backwards?
Perhaps the 37 airplanes in three months is a factor?
Regardless - sleep deprived or not - this is a fabulous place. Some of the highlights:
1) Hong Kong taxis. They are all Toyota Crown cars (insert recall joke here) and they whip around the city in no time flat - taking a taxi here is a treat....
2) ...except when travelling up to Stanley Market. The winding streets and up and down of the hills is enough to test even the strongest of stomachs. I always seem to have a can of gingerale on me.
3) There is such an interesting mix of the West and the East here. You can get almost anything from either culture and it all fits together harmoniously.
4) Sitting in a restaurant on the Kowloon side watching the light show at 8 pm on the Hong Kong side - lasers, spotlights and seizure inducing strobes!
5) Shopping. Stanley has to be one of my favourite markets in the world. There is a jewellery store there that is simply amazing. Don't ask me the name but I sure can draw you a map to it. They will make earrings to match a necklace if they don't have any on display and they offer generous discounts when making bulk purchases.
I'll be sad to leave tomorrow (as I jet off to Sydney) but mostly I just want some sleep!
24 February 2010
16 days to go
until the 2nd Annual production of A Memory, A Monologue, A Rant and A Prayer!
For those of you who know me well you know the women and girls of the DRC have been much on my mind for almost two years now. This production, this fight, this call to attention is so important to me. I want to change the story of women and girls - especially in the DRC.
If you're in Ottawa, please come out on March 13th to the Theatre of the Canadian Museum of Civilization. We have an amazing cast featuring Hedy Fry, Jason Tetro, Katherine Dines, Bill Welychka, Erin Blaskie, Alan Neal, Kerry Pither and Adrian Harewood. All of these busy people are giving up their evening and using their talent to make a difference.
There is an awesome silent auction as well.
Tickets are $30 and available at the CMC box office - 819.776.7000
More information can be found at www.hopeangercourage.com
For those of you who know me well you know the women and girls of the DRC have been much on my mind for almost two years now. This production, this fight, this call to attention is so important to me. I want to change the story of women and girls - especially in the DRC.
If you're in Ottawa, please come out on March 13th to the Theatre of the Canadian Museum of Civilization. We have an amazing cast featuring Hedy Fry, Jason Tetro, Katherine Dines, Bill Welychka, Erin Blaskie, Alan Neal, Kerry Pither and Adrian Harewood. All of these busy people are giving up their evening and using their talent to make a difference.
There is an awesome silent auction as well.
Tickets are $30 and available at the CMC box office - 819.776.7000
More information can be found at www.hopeangercourage.com
11 February 2010
At the heart of it all
Greetings from South Africa!
There is a saying that Africa is the heart of the world and I must say that after a few days here I can hear the world's heart beating loudly and with great strength.
Today is the 20th anniversary of Nelson Mandela's release from prison. It is a day that proved, in the end, if you remain true to who you are and continue in pursuit of justice and freedom, regardless of the circumstances, then there is no prison man can build that will contain you. I feel so blessed and fortunate to be here on a day like this. I remember spending time in high school and again in university writing and campaigning for Mandela's release. I joined the protest at Carleton University demanding my school divest itself from South Africa if apartheid was allowed to continue.
In speaking with some of the locals here it is amazing to discover that people my age had no idea of who Mandela was until after he was released. How much can that turn your world on its axis? One morning you wake up to discover a man you never heard of, is a hero to millions and is going to change your country in fundamental ways. The love and respect with which these people now speak of him is a testament to the adaptability of the human spirit and is a signal that anything is possible.
South Africa - the new South Africa - still has many growing pains. The security briefing we received upon arrival was enough to keep us tethered to our hotel for the first few nights as crime here is rampant and violent (but we have since grown a little braver and have seen a little more - but cautiously). There are no more political barriers that separate the people but there are economic ones. The disparity between the classes and ultimately the races can be jarring at times. The drive from Jo'burg to Pretoria offers a wide range of what the country struggles with.
But all countries struggle and so South Africa joins the rest of us.
Long before Obama turned hope into a campaign slogan, Mandela provided it to over 25 million, from his tiny cell on Robben Island. He has said the poem Invictus was one that sustained him during his time there. "I am the Master of my fate; I am the Captain of my soul."
Let freedom reign.
*****
and for a little bit of levity, here is a photo of me being smooched by an elephant. Being that close to such an amazing creature is a
gift...and will be the subject of another blog post. 29 January 2010
Worth
How much is a life worth? The answer that comes to mind for most all of us is that it is impossible to place a monetary value on the life of a human being.
But we do it all the time. We as individuals, and governments acting in our names make such determinations on a daily basis. What we give to charity and to which charity is an indication of what value we place on a life or lives.
The recent tragedy in Haiti has proven that when crisis hits we are capable of giving in ways we perhaps were not sure were possible. The Canadian government has pledged to match all donations to Haiti by Canadians dollar for dollar and recent meetings about Haiti in Montreal have suggested the global community is looking to make upwards of a $10 billion investment in the stricken country over the next 10 years.
This is amazing and needed news. The earthquake and aftermath in Haiti is absolutely devastating and we must, as part of our obligation to each other, help them rebuild in a sustainable way.
But what value are we placing on the life of Congolese women and girls?
Readers of this space know that for over a year now I have been seized with the situation in the DRC - home to the worst sexual violence in the world. Just stop and think about that sentence for a moment - worst sexual violence in the world. No matter how horrific the stories of rape you hear coming from other countries, there exists a place on this planet where it is worse.
And we have done nothing. We have not responded in any tangible way to the crisis in the DRC that is now closing in on a decade and a half. For 13 years the women and girls in Eastern DRC have been raped and re-raped. Raped once, twice, three times. By men in uniform. By men out of uniform. By men who are supposed to protect them.
Their insides have been physically destroyed. Their insides have been spiritually damaged. The women don't scream because no one will come. After 13 years they know the global community is not coming to rescue them or protect them. They have been ignored and they have been told by us their lives are worth less.
In this great article from the Times, Dr. Mukwege of Panzi Hospital proves that one person can bring hope where none seems to exist. (We're just going to skip over the fact that it's in the Life and Style section as opposed to the News section)
He is engaged in a rebuilding project that is as complex and long term as that in Haiti, for Dr. Mukwege is rebuilding not just women's reproductive and urinary functions but he is helping them rebuild their souls.
The longer we allow this situation to continue the longer we tell a whole population of women and girls that their lives have no value.
If we are to be judged based on how we treat the weakest of our society then we should be judged as failures. All of the good works and good intentions to deliver the people of Haiti from tragedy does not and will not give us a free pass on our inability and unwillingness to deliver the women and girls of the DRC from the horror they have lived every day for 13 years.
***
If you're in Ottawa and want to help, please join me on March 13th at the Canadian Museum of Civilization for a benefit reading of A Memory, A Monologue, A Rant and A Prayer. All funds raised will be given to Panzi Hospital, CARE Canada and Family Services Ottawa
But we do it all the time. We as individuals, and governments acting in our names make such determinations on a daily basis. What we give to charity and to which charity is an indication of what value we place on a life or lives.
The recent tragedy in Haiti has proven that when crisis hits we are capable of giving in ways we perhaps were not sure were possible. The Canadian government has pledged to match all donations to Haiti by Canadians dollar for dollar and recent meetings about Haiti in Montreal have suggested the global community is looking to make upwards of a $10 billion investment in the stricken country over the next 10 years.
This is amazing and needed news. The earthquake and aftermath in Haiti is absolutely devastating and we must, as part of our obligation to each other, help them rebuild in a sustainable way.
But what value are we placing on the life of Congolese women and girls?
Readers of this space know that for over a year now I have been seized with the situation in the DRC - home to the worst sexual violence in the world. Just stop and think about that sentence for a moment - worst sexual violence in the world. No matter how horrific the stories of rape you hear coming from other countries, there exists a place on this planet where it is worse.
And we have done nothing. We have not responded in any tangible way to the crisis in the DRC that is now closing in on a decade and a half. For 13 years the women and girls in Eastern DRC have been raped and re-raped. Raped once, twice, three times. By men in uniform. By men out of uniform. By men who are supposed to protect them.
Their insides have been physically destroyed. Their insides have been spiritually damaged. The women don't scream because no one will come. After 13 years they know the global community is not coming to rescue them or protect them. They have been ignored and they have been told by us their lives are worth less.
In this great article from the Times, Dr. Mukwege of Panzi Hospital proves that one person can bring hope where none seems to exist. (We're just going to skip over the fact that it's in the Life and Style section as opposed to the News section)
Like many girls, Ruth was held in the forest as a sex slave where she was tied to a tree and raped by passing soldiers for several days at a time. Months passed, but eventually Ruth was released and allowed to begin the arduous journey to Panzi hospital. She was pregnant.
“It was tragic,” Dr Mukwege says. “The baby was stillborn. But her internal injuries were too severe to repair. As her doctor I am pleased that I could restore urinary continence and fit her with a colostomy. But she does not have a vagina, she will never have a period. In her own eyes she is no longer a woman.”
He is engaged in a rebuilding project that is as complex and long term as that in Haiti, for Dr. Mukwege is rebuilding not just women's reproductive and urinary functions but he is helping them rebuild their souls.
The longer we allow this situation to continue the longer we tell a whole population of women and girls that their lives have no value.
If we are to be judged based on how we treat the weakest of our society then we should be judged as failures. All of the good works and good intentions to deliver the people of Haiti from tragedy does not and will not give us a free pass on our inability and unwillingness to deliver the women and girls of the DRC from the horror they have lived every day for 13 years.
***
If you're in Ottawa and want to help, please join me on March 13th at the Canadian Museum of Civilization for a benefit reading of A Memory, A Monologue, A Rant and A Prayer. All funds raised will be given to Panzi Hospital, CARE Canada and Family Services Ottawa
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