2009 To Dos

With this year winding down, I pulled up my 2008 To Do list and colour me shocked to find out that I did almost everything I said I was going to! The list was small but had some pretty big ideas on it:



1) Get a job. I got a job. I probably have more job than I really want but I am finally back in an environment where my contributions are recognized, where my opinion carries weight and where what I do matters.



2) Find a signature scent. I DID!! And I smell awesome. If you don't believe me sniff me next time you see me!



3) Start and finish The Project. Okay so I didn't finish the project but my partner and I have made big inroads in The Project and are looking forward to continuing success on it in 2009.



4) Get on a first name basis with the sales folks at Banana Republic. Having suffered through a "friend" repeatedly telling me that Banana Republic didn't qualify as real clothes only spurred me on to shop there more. After all, dropping big bucks at Marc Jacobs or Prada doesn't make your clothes more real, just more expensive. And while I'm not on a first name basis with the sales staff, I do enjoy shopping at BR. And even more so I enjoy not having negative people in my life any longer.



5) Train for a triathlon. Well....my recurring knee injury has prevented this but I have managed to train for a number of things and enjoy my time with Andrew Torquemada.



6) Be more creative. I have let my little creative being out to play more and more. She's coloured on walls and dreamed some big moments and she's writing up a storm - hopefully 2009 will hold the payoff to all the writing.



All in all, I think that's pretty good. Of course a new year requires a new list and this is what I have in mind for 2009:



1) Volunteer overseas. I have plans to spend a month in Africa working with HIV orphans. I have put my money where my mouth is on the subject of HIV/AIDS in my own community for a number of years but now it's time for me to give what I can to those who need it most. I also know I will leave the experience richer than I can possibly imagine



2) Dance. My poor battered joints are not really able to take on ballet any longer but that doesn't mean I can't get a groove on. I love to dance - it is as natural for me as breathing and this is the year that I will breathe fully and deeply again.



3) Inspire others to action. There are things going on in this world that leave me speechless and breathless in their inhumanity and acts of evil must be countered with acts of goodness. I'll have more to share on this in a little while.



4) Share more adventures with friends. 2008 took me to Argentina, Uruguay, New York and Los Angeles among other places and I shared those moments with some pretty awesome friends like Trixie and RWB. I cannot wait to see where 2009 brings us.



5) Tattoo Two. I have an idea for a second tattoo and I'm pretty sure I know where I want it. Photos will follow when it's done.



I truly hope that 2009 is filled with wondrous moments and more opportunities to laugh loudly, love deeply and sing freely than you can handle.



xoxoxo

Lessons from 2008

This isn't necessarily a year in review - after all there are a few more days in 2008 and anything can happen - but I have learned some interesting things this year and thought I would share:

1) When you take a leap of faith, you may not land where you expect to but you inevitably land where you need to be.

2) The internet is filled with crazy people dressed in normal clothing.

3) Ending a friendship can be harder and messier than ending a romantic relationship.

4) People who refuse to accept no for an answer do not respect you.

5) The minute I enter Sephora I can count on my bank account depleting directly in proportion to the amount of time I spend there.

6) Puppet fights in bookstores are good for the soul.

7) Faith - all kinds of faith - is a big part of my foundation and as result will be hugely tested.

8) Death, no matter how expected, can break a heart.

9) There is nothing more exciting than an adventure that is just about to begin

10) Telling the people who matter to me that I love them gets easier the more often I do it.

What are your lessons from this year?

ps - spare a good thought for sweetpea and her family.

Joy to the world - Peace on earth for all

Christmas is indeed a magical day if for no other reason than it seems the world seems to hold its breath for a few hours before carrying on.

At mass last night I was struck by the feeling that voices united in song produce. The entire congregation sang 'O Come All Ye Faithful' as the entrance hymn and it was a powerful moment to hear and feel all those voices singing as one. It is a reminder that when we speak with one voice on any matter we can drown out those who are not interested in peace or equality and change the world around us.

The other reason Christmas is so magical for me is because I find a quiet moment to take stock of my life and every year, regardless of some of the ups and downs I experience, I come to the same conclusion - I am enormously blessed.

I am grateful for the gift of friendship that is given to me by so many. This year has been a year of renewing old friendships and strengthening new ones. How very lucky I am.

Some of my friends are facing some difficult moments over Christmas this year and amidst the celebrations of the next few days I will keep them in my thoughts and in my heart with a most fervent wish that the love and support of those who care for them will help them through. Much love to Sweetpea, J.O and Cathy.

My wish and hope for all of you is a life filled with blessings, love and laughter.

Merry Christmas.

L xoxo

'Twas the night before Christmas

and all through the office, not a creature was stirring inside the fortress....

except for me. and my boss. and our assistant. and maybe 15 other people.

while most of my colleagues were released at noon a few of us - the brave, the chosen, the colossally unlucky - are required to stay behind to deal with a situation that shows no signs of ending.

don't get me wrong, I am not whinging about not leaving early, after all this isn't my first rodeo and I have worked plenty of Christmas Eves long past noon. but staying late presents a few logistical problems not the least of which being there is no food. both the cafeteria and the dépanneur in this building are closed. locked up tight. the vending machines work about as well as bush's economic plan so that's out of the question. what is a girl to do?

*dons ninja gear*

raid other people's offices.

this is the time of year when all kinds of goodies lay about on counter tops, desks and in common areas just begging to be eaten. (if only dating were as easy)

and so I set out on a quest to keep our assistant and I nourished as we continue to work away. I did have to dodge a few stragglers who were standing around wishing all the best for the *insert non-offensive secular holiday name here* but being very bendy and stealthy is helpful in times like these.

I did the best I could with what was available and returned to the office with my spoils. to hold us over until we are set free from the Fortress I have amassed the following:

* two candy canes - small

* a handful of hershey's kisses (not applicable for me)

* two werther's caramels -one hard and one soft (again, sounds a lot like dating)

* one ferrero rocher chocolate (again, not applicable for me)

I now feel like I'm in an episode of Survivor. I'll let you know how Tribal Council turns out.

in the meantime - spare a thought for those of us still slugging away.

Things I don't understand...

1) How I can cry at the exact same spot while re-watching a West Wing episode for the 25th time.

2) Why mannequins have nipples. Especially when I spend money on bras to keep mine from poking an eye out. Is it somehow to confirm their gender in case the breasts and female clothing weren't enough?

3) How the Senators looked so terrible against the Lightning last night.

4) Why the OC Transpo drivers think anyone has sympathy for their strike. It's Christmas and it's cold and there are large segments of this city's population who rely on public transit for everything.

5) How anyone can know about what is happening in the Congo and Zimbabwe and sleep. It makes me want to scream from every roof top I can find. It's bored a whole in my gut and I remain appalled at how the governments of the G8 have been painfully and shamefully silent on the issue.

6) How Stephen Lewis continues to work as hard at 72 as he did at 42. His passion and commitment are an inspiration and his final speech of 2008 is a call to action

7) Why anyone is interested in Britney Spears.

8) The end of The Children of Men

Leftovers

As you know I moved recently and am still sorting through boxes. Even though the boxes were packed up not so long ago, they still somehow manage to contain a few surprises. Which leads me to tonight's question:

Ever break up with someone and look at the stuff left behind and ask yourself "what the hell do I do with this?" Just exactly what does one do when all that's left of a person's presence in your life is leftovers?

Pictures, jewellery and mementos seem to sit on a shelf and taunt you with ghosts of memories past. And so what do you do? Do you return them? Do you dispose of them? Gift them to friends with a quick explanation of how you hope they can bring new and good karma to something that clearly had none?

And if it's not a lover, if it's a friendship that has crumbled under the weight of expectation and inappropriate intention, then what?

I suppose a gift is not the intention. I guess you really cannot hold an object responsible for whatever the giver was trying to accomplish. If you accept a gift or a memento with an open heart and an open mind is that not enough to counter whatever manipulation was intended by the giver?

Objects that represent memories have the capacity to take on mythic importance in the mind. They can become the burning symbol of a great moment however fleeting or they can be a bitter reminder of disillusionment. Different friends have offered different answers ranging from "set it on fire" to "wear it/use it."

Trixie is in the "wear it/use it" camp and I think that has some merit. I think if you make the object ordinary then you can take away any mythic or special symbolism it dangles in front of you when you look at it.

So I think the goal over the next few weeks is to work my way through the leftovers until they belong to me, until they host memories or moments unrelated to their origin and then they just become things - nice things - but just things.

Adventures in Chicagoland

It is the audacity of hope that brought RWB and I to Chicago. The audacity to hope that we could touch the hem of the cloak of Barack Obama ObamaBuddahJesusKrishna and be healed. Alas, it was not to be. Despite our best efforts, there was no audience to be granted with His Hopeness and so we were left to our own devices.

Now, for those of you who know us, us being left to our own devices is a bit of a mixed bag, (examples to follow).

Our adventure started at the Trump Hotel, a towering 96 story homage to luxury overlooking the Chicago River. Our hotel came complete with its own Bling water and an offer on the menu to sample Mr. Trump's wedge. Errrr....ummmm....I'll pass, thanks. RWB, much like the bush people who suddenly discover the telephone, was absolutely dumbstruck by the television embedded in the mirror in the bathroom. She could be heard touching it and proclaiming out loud, in a wondrous tone "My precious".

What is a trip to Chi-town without deep dish pizza? A trip to Lou Malnati's delivered in spades along with a local wheat beer (whose name escapes me - I blame the cold)

Saturday began with a dose of culture at the Art Institute of Chicago. We wandered for hours, examining everything from Modern American art to the Impressionists. Jenn will be pleased (err, or not) to know that Madonna with Creepy Baby is not just a phenomenon found at the Met, it can also been seen in Chicago. And it's clear to me that Renaissance painters had some basic anatomy issues as the last time I checked women's breasts do not protrude from their shoulder. If they do, they need a better bra. I am pleased to report we have finally broken our streak of being shushed in museums.

We then hit The Magnificent Mile - which was rendered a little less magnificent by the weather's attempt to freeze my lips off. RWB, a true NoCal girl, was on a quest - a quest for ear muffs. We popped into Banana Republic where I found a nice set of grey ear muffs - very sensible and warm. I was simply not ready for the level of dissatisfaction she expressed on seeing them. In fact, her whine was so loud that mothers throughout the store turned and glared at their kids, thinking it was one of them.

Having rejected all possible ear muffs - like Prince Charming looking for someone to fit the shoe - we headed to Macy's. There, with what seemed to be a light shining around them, was exactly what she was looking for. Rabbit-fur muffs. There were squeals of delight at having achieved the quest. RWB was pretty happy too.

I suppose when you live in NoCal, les acoutrements de l'hiver have a certain cachet to them. With the way she was stroking those furry muffs her purchase, I was worried I might need to give her a few moments alone. Only a few people pointed and laughed as she wore them inside the restaurant (okay, not really but it paints a nice picture, no?)

On Sunday we found (thanks to Trixie) Breakfast Mecca. The Original Pancake House is a gift from the gods. Or maybe ObamaBuddahJesusKrishna. Whoever bestowed this blessing on the world needs to be remembered in song and statue for pancakes this fluffy are the stuff of legend.

I'm not sure what I can say about our hand puppet fight in Borders other than my three headed dragon so kicked the ass of her wimpy rabbit. We also spent some time in the Romance section - she looking for titles involving Vikings and I only just dissuaded her from buying a book featuring a time traveling Viking who winds up in Baghdad as a Navy Seal.

Our attempts to dig up a little piece of dirt from Grant Park were thwarted. Primarily because the ground was frozen solid and I was without my blow torch. (Who knew you couldn't bring that on a plane?)

Alas, I am now back at home where it is substantially colder than El Windy City while RWB enjoys one more day as a guest of Mr. Trump and his wedge.

Today during my lunch hour I....

1) over tipped my taxi driver by $10

2) protested on Parliament Hill the PM's cowardly request to prorogue Parliament rather than face a democratic vote on his Economic Statement

3) alerted a police officer to the idiot who was dumping buckets of water on the steps by the canal and then laughing at the people who would inevitably slip, fall and possibly break something

4) walked back to the office

And you? What did you do?

Of coups and constitutions

"And a prime minister’s first job is to assure his government’s hold on power, and avoid defeat in the House. " - L. Ian McDonald - National Post.

This was the final sentence at the end of an opinion piece in today's National Post and it gave me significant pause. It gave me pause because I think it is perhaps the most telling thing I have read in a very long time. We - and by we I mean the media, the people and the politicians (especially the politicians) have lost the plot.

A prime minister's first job is not to assure his government's hold on power and avoid defeat. His first job - his priority is to govern on behalf of all of Canadians not just those who elected his party (in this case 36% of the country).

I'd also like to point out that I said 'those who elected his party' and not 'those who elected him.' Because in the chaos of the last few days I have heard the Tories extol how Canadians didn't elect Stephane Dion. Well, in fact, Canadians did in fact elect Stephane Dion - the people of Saint-Laurent-Cartierville are, last time I checked, Canadians.

The whole of Canada didn't elect any leader because we don't do that here. Canada is founded on the British Parliamentary system and is a Constitutional Monarchy - not a republic. This means that Canadians vote only for the candidates in their riding. Stephen Harper was elected by the residents of Calgary Centre - not by the country at large. (I should point out I am willing to send the Tories copies of Eugene Forsey's How Canadians Govern Themselves should they need some clarity)

The beauty of the Parliamentary system is that absent winning a majority of seats in the House you must - must - work cooperatively with the other members to ensure smooth passage of legislation. If you don't, you risk defeat and then it is up to the Governor General - not the Prime Minister - as to what happens next.

I have been alternately amused and outraged at the propagation of lies by the Tories. The mere hint that the motion put forth by the Opposition is undemocratic is absurd. It is so absurd that those who continue to repeat it should be forced to wear dunce caps and stand in the corner with gum on their nose.

It is incredibly democratic. It just may not be desirable. This is what the Opposition is supposed to do - this is their job and their constitutional responsibility. They must - must - hold the government accountable. If the government cannot maintain the confidence of the House then that is on them, not the Opposition.

The Tories have launched a PR campaign today encouraging people to push for an election. So much for fiscal leadership. The last election cost $300 million. So in these tough economic times the obvious answer is to spend another $300 million? Especially when there is another viable and constitutional option available to our Head of State? (who is, again, NOT the PM).

I also find the hand ringing and pearl clutching over the participation of the Bloq Quebecois to be beyond the pale. First of all, they are also duly elected by Canadians. While I disagree with every fibre of my being with their principal raison d'être, there are those that don't and who have elected them to Parliament since 1990. They have also served as Her Majesty's Official Opposition in which they were required to and did work on behalf of all of Canada. Stephen Harper courted their support himself in 2004 when he wanted to replace Paul Martin's Liberals and as little has changed about the BQ in 18 years, one therefore has to assume that Harper is awash in hypocrisy. You cannot proclaim someone Prom Queen and then call her a fraud when she dances with someone else.

This is not a coup. This doesn't meet any definition of a coup. It is a democratic exercise that is constitutionally and legally sound.

Despite the PM's best try, he is proving it is not possible to suck and blow at the same time.

World AIDS Day

It is World AIDS Day. It is the 20th such day and is an anniversary many of us would prefer not to have to mark. While much progress has been made, the battle continues to tip in favour of the virus and not us.

It's very tempting to list statistics to illustrate the point. I could, for example, tell you that there are 33 million people worldwide infected with HIV. I could tell you globally there are 15 million children orphaned due to AIDS. Women now account for more than 50% of all HIV infection and that for every two people who are put on anti-retroviral medication (ARV), five more are infected.

The problem with statistics, however, is they do not speak to the human element and make no mistake, AIDS and our reaction to it is very much about the human condition. After all statistics cannot articulate the holes left in the hearts of the more than 2 million families who buried loved ones last year alone. Statistics do not tell how the lives of those children orphaned by this disease have been unjustly and forever altered by the loss of their parents. Nor can statistics convey the hatred that still exists for those who are infected. This is a disease that allows people to make moral judgements about those infected and therefore justify their inaction and intolerance. Even amazing national contributions like the United States' PEPFAR program ties so much of its money to morality that some countries, like Brazil, who are in desperate need of help, have rejected the helping hand.

The world has known no pandemic as virulent and vicious as AIDS. And yet despite the swath of destruction cut across the globe by this unrelenting disease, the world has seemingly moved on. There are other diseases, economic crises, wars and any other number of valid reasons not to pay attention any longer. AIDS is now viewed an African problem or a Southeast Asian problem - tucked far away from the stark glare of those of us in the West. Besides, we all know that even if you have the misfortune to be infected, you can just pop a couple of pills and carry on, right? The success of ARVs has allowed some to gloss over the universal truth about AIDS - it kills. Every single time.

There have been remarkable successes in the development of treatment for HIV/AIDS and that has allowed for wondrous moments like HIV+ women safely giving birth to children. There have also been remarkable failures - the failure of microbicides to work has long reaching effects in the poorest countries of the world where the lack of gender equality and the prevalence of sexual violence place women at enormous, heart stopping, breathtaking risk for infection. It seems, some days, that for every gain made there are several more losses that accompany it. The smartest minds in the field are hopeful for a cure but do not believe that one is coming any time soon.

It is very easy to be maudlin and dark about the state of HIV/AIDS today and cynicism can take hold so easily - I myself am guilty at times on all counts. But there are moments of hope to be found among all of it - not the least of which is the knowledge that we are not required to wait for our governments to act. Inside each one of us exists the capacity and the ability to change the course of this disease if only we accept the challenge.

The theme for World AIDS Day 2008 is Lead, Empower, Deliver and you can do all three of those things and you can get others to do them and much like the virus itself, this too can spread quickly and change everything.

1. Lead - Talk to your children, your friends, your parents, your neighbours. Tell them what you know about HIV/AIDS. Offer to talk to school classes or Girl Guides or Boy Scouts or talk to your congregation at church. Leadership isn't always about grand actions - the most successful leadership is done in small steps and movements.

2. Empower - Read. Ask questions. Donate money or, more valuable, your time to organizations that do more than just provide treatment - find organizations that teach skills, provide education, offer resources to those who need them. Visit a hospice and visit with those who are suffering - hold their hand - you will both be empowered to fight on as a result. Write your elected representatives and give them the facts and tell them what you want them to do in your name - empower them to act.

3. Deliver - Deliver love, empathy, compassion to those in need. Offer tolerance in the face of intolerance. Deliver on what you have told others you would do. Practice safe sex every single time.

We are our brother's keeper. We have a responsibility to protect ourselves and others. And on this day - this day of all days - seize the moment, take the opportunity to do something.